It’s Monday again, most likely you are getting back to the grind, pouring yourself that extra cup of coffee and doing your best to gear up for the rest of the work week. You can do it! Remember take it day by day, believe in yourself, and practice self-care.
Seeing that this blog has been “live” for about two weeks now, I have decided to share my current and unique self-care story. Now, let me remind you that everyone’s eating disorder, as well as, everyone’s recovery looks and feels different, it is unique to the person that you are, but it is also unique to WHERE you are within your life, and recovery. For instance, I consider myself fully recovered, in that most professionals would consider me “recovered,” but I believe that recovery is a process, a journey and is therefore NOT LINEAR, because all human beings deserve self-care, and a chance to learn and grow, and a chance to live healthy lives…. and that is what recovery is all about right?!
So here it is…..
The past four years of my life have been beautiful, in that I was forced to grow, to change, to challenge myself and work my way through recovery. I am a self admittedly “girly girl” from the suburbs of Chicago; I went to school in Charleston, SC and fell in love with the small city life, the beach, and the southern charm. Once I graduated from the College of Charleston, I went straight to Jackson, WY to be with my lovely and amazing boyfriend Sean. This was incredibly out of character for me in so many ways…. because I am extremely close with my family and my girl friends, therefore taking myself so far from that support system was a major risk and challenge for me as a young woman! Long story short, I planned on staying in Jackson for about a summer, and three years later Sean and I are moving on! We are in transition right now, but have jobs and an apartment lined up in Charleston, SC!
I left Jackson about two months early for an employment opportunity in Charleston, SC, but things changed and I decided to stay with my parents in Chicago for the remaining two months, while Sean finished up his time in Jackson. Therefore, Sean and I have been apart for over a month now, he is living with our cat Lilly in Jackson, and I am in the Chicago area with my family and Giovanni, our dog. We have a little less than a month to go until we will be moving into our new place in Charleston, SC, and we cannot wait to be back together again!
Understanding all of this, there are many changes happening within our lives right now…a huge move, new jobs, and all the change that comes along with it (Family “stuff,” financial stress, being away from each other, etc)! I am going to admit that being away from Sean and Lilly has been the biggest challenge for me, in that he has been my major support system these past four years, he is my rock within my life, and recovery, and I could not state how grateful I am for Sean! Now Lilly is a whole different story, and I will elaborate on that within a different post, as she is my “Recovery Kitty”
All of this change has been somewhat triggering for me within my recovery, and has really forced me to take care of myself and practice self-care! Therefore, being at home has been a wonderful thing, but also a major challenge, in that I am working that much harder to protect my recovery…because change is hard and it is scary…. and incredibly triggering within anyone’s recovery!
Now that you have an idea of my current “story” I want to give you a look into how I have been practicing self-care throughout these vulnerable times…
Take care of your inner child:
Throughout my “treatment” of my eating disorder, I was told many of times to love myself, to care for myself, to nourish myself…. but what really hit home for me was when my specialized therapist asked me to take care and love my inner child, as if my inner child was an actual seven year old Jayne, living my adult life with me. This really hit home for me, because my eating disorder began at a very young age, therefore at times, I felt sad that “little jayne” lost some of her innocence at the young age of ten years old.
No matter how old you are, I am sure that you can agree that being back at home can be incredibly comforting while also being stressful and triggering, in that you automatically fall into your old role. For instance, this past month I have been fighting this old role, in that I am the daughter, the middle child, the sister, and the Jayne that was living with an eating disorder, the Jayne that was keeping secrets, and using unhealthy behaviors. With that being said, I have been pampering my inner child, I have been living the life of innocent Jayne whenever I can in between graduate school, my part-time job, and helping out my family.
Because of my past jobs, and where I lived, I have had very minimal time with my family, which has caused for a lot of stress in my own personal life. My family has experienced so much loss this year, and therefore I am doing everything I can to get the most out of these two months in Chicago…I have been helping out wherever and whenever needed, as well as, enjoying every minute I have with my parents, aunts, uncles, sisters, sisters boyfriends, and of course the family pets!
No, I do not mean that I punish myself and lock myself in my room until I am ready to behave….instead I mean that I give myself some necessary alone time! My alone time usually occurs in the morning, while I get ready for my day, or late at night after writing a research paper…. I have been trying to take care and love my inner child, and bring a bit of innocence to my life…
Jamming to my favorite songs, signing into my hairbrush and performing for my mirror…. what could be more innocent than that!?…
Let me tell you, I have been LOVING my time-outs!
Depending on whether I’m in the mood to take a shower or bath, I make sure to make an ordeal out of it! I put on some relaxing tunes, steam up the bathroom, and set aside at least twenty minutes to wash away the day, and start fresh for a relaxing bedtime.
The majority of our house has been redone in the past ten years…. but our childhood bathroom is still in tact, who doesn’t love the Rainbow fish?!
This is something I struggle finding time to do…because I read and write constantly for my job and school, I tend to turn to TV or music before bed….which in no way is bad…but I find that when i do carve time out to read before bed I feel relaxed! Remember how special story time was when we were kids?! Maybe I’m not reading The Very Hungry Caterpillar, or The Rainbow Fish….but nourishing my mind and soul with words has always been comforting to me!
The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz, is an amazing book, that I choose to read over and over and over again…just like I did with my favorite books as a kid!
Okay now this is incredibly serious…. sleep was and still is a crucial part to my recovery! Sleep allows your mind, and body to heal itself, to reboot, to refresh in order to prepare yourself for the next day of your recovery! Therefore, I have been practicing a nightly bedtime routine, to ensure I receive the adequate amount of sleep for myself…. please let it be known that I am aware, that I have the luxury to receive an ample amount of sleep, at this point in my life…. but take a peek at this simple tool with the new iPhone update!…Giovanni has been practicing self care as well!
I ask all of you to continue to take care, love and pamper your inner child! We ALL deserve some extra love, and care but also a little bit of innocence! So as we move through the rest of our Monday, and the rest of the week, don’t forget to Self-Care It Out People!!
What does your inner child like to do?….feel free to pass around ideas for additional self care!
#SelfCareItOut #RecoveryLoveAndCare #SelfCareMondays #InnerChild #EmbracingYourInnerChild #Innocence #Recovery #EatingDisorderRecovery #RecoveryIsNotLinear #ItsAJourney