Bay State to Broad’s original post…. More Than Just a Number I’m so excited to feature one of my sweetest friends on Bay State to Broad today! Jayne grew up just outside of Chicago. I grew up just outside of Boston. Jayne transferred schools after her freshman year to The College of Charleston. I transferred schools after my freshman year to The University of South Carolina. Jayne and I both decided to study abroad in Florence, Italy. We were paired in an apartment together more than 4,000 miles from home. After college, Jayne and I went in opposite directions. I went back to Massachusetts, while she made a cross-country journey to Jackson Hole, Wyoming. Five years later, Jayne and I live just a few miles down the road from each other in charming Charleston, South Carolina. Week three of friendship! Wine tasting excursion through the hills of Tuscany. (Hashtag babies.) Jayne blogs over at Recovery Love and Care, a blog, website, and brand that helps those with Eating Disorders and their loved ones move through the journey of self-care, self-love, and recovery. She is working towards obtaining her graduate degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling at The Chicago School of
Tag: #EatingDisorderRecovery
Be Your Own Advocate
Whether within recovery from poor self-image, people pleasing, lack of self worth, or an Eating Disorder, having a voice for yourself is crucial. Advocacy is one of those things that doesn’t necessarily seem natural to us, in that we were never taught how to assert ourselves, promote ourselves and look out for the greater good of our souls. We grew up with parents, or guardians of some sort as our advocates, teachers, coaches, tutors, aids, peers, counselors, and even companies and government officials who speak on behalf of us. Within daily life, as an individual, the only advocate is yourself. It takes courage, adjustment, and self-acceptance, but the moment you start to advocate for yourself, the moment you begin to look out for the greater good of your physical, mental, and emotional wellbeing, the moment you talk on behalf of your soul, is when you will truly be advocating for yourself, and this is self care at its finest! If you don’t advocate for your emotional well being who will?! No one. Because, you, and you only, are the one who knows your limitations, boundaries, feelings, emotions and state of wellbeing. The absence of advocacy calls for compliance, blurred boundaries,
Our “BUTS” are getting in the way…How AND Why to Live an “AND” Life!
After a long and grueling week at my second, and final Residency in Chicago I am feeling more grounded in not only my professional skills, but also my personal skills on a level higher than I ever imagined possible at this point within my life! I learned that despite my mental and emotional exhaustion, despite moments of self-doubt, and feelings of being invisible in the midst of an obvious power differential, I was able to trust the process, and come out even stronger because of it. Within our lives we constantly cut ourselves short from growth and change, and we stay within a place of comfort by avoiding the unknown. We “yes, BUT” ourselves through life, by excusing out of the box or adventurous ideas with “realism”, we nod our heads when in reality we are saying no, and with this we stunt our lives and we cut off chances for opportunities and growth. It is possible to live a busy life AND take care of yourself….trust me I test this skill out every single day. There are times within our daily lives when we believe that there is no chance for rest, there is not time for self-care, and
Self Love, Short and Sweet
Here is my professional and personal take on self-love, I’ll make this short and sweet! Self love is a new concept to many, in that it is not something that we were taught about in school, it is not something that was drilled into our minds much like math, science, and geography, instead it is a concept that is incredibly foreign to us. Why is this? Why is such an important and crucial concept so new to us within our adult years? I don’t quite have the answer to this, because the lack of self-love has fostered a world of negativity, hatred, illness, and self-loathing. In a world filled with selfies, hash tags and filters, it can be easy to view self love as selfishness, narcissism, and fabrication…. and yes, this does exist, but this is not self love. Self-love is appreciating the person that you are, accepting yourself for your flaws, loving yourself for the good and the bad, loving the black and white while also embracing the grey! Self love is loving yourself, for yourself, not for someone else’s gratification, not doing it for likes on Instagram and Facebook, not doing it for followers, or social acceptance,
Awareness in Body Checking: Taking One More Step Towards Living a Body Positive Life
As another extension to my body positive series, today’s post is about body checking. Body checking is a very common behavior within individuals with Eating Disorders. What do I mean by body checking? Body checking: Constant “checking”, looking, touching, and/or intensely focusing on a body part and/or section or area of your body. The “checking” is fueled by insecurities on how the individual thinks or feels that they look. My Story: This is something that many individuals struggle with throughout their Eating Disorder. One main form of body checking is involves mirror checking…. It started at the young age of ten, when I went through puberty, every single time I went to use the restroom, whether it was in a public place, school, work, or at home, I would wash my hands, look in the mirror, suck in my stomach, and slightly lift my shirt, to check my belly with my hand in the mirror. Every time I looked at my belly in the mirror I hoped to find some sort of strength, success, and worth. It became so much of a habit that I did not even realize I was doing it. One day my nutritionist advised me to
Find your Flow and Growth within 2017
Happy Day to everyone!! 2017, I have positive, healthy and manageable expectations for you!…..oh my….even I rolled my eyes while writing that! What I mean is that, as we move into this new year, I remind myself, and others, that a specific day and number do not dictate the outcome for the next 365 days of life! Instead, our thoughts, words, and actions affect the present and future, therefore having healthy expectations about this “new year” is incredibly helpful to our happiness, because, yes, we will set out a new plan and goals for ourselves, but we will have ourselves to thank for bringing any change to our current life flow. I use the word expectation fairly often within my blog posts, and I do this because expectations can either set us up for success, and reality, or failure and disappointment, therefore when a manageable, and positive expectation is set, only growth can occur…no matter the actual outcome. As you set these expectations for 2017, I encourage you to change your train of thought and consider your current situation. Within your life, are you allowing flow? Are you truly experiencing the present, and flowing through the reality of your individual
Turkey Day Tips
Thanksgiving is quickly approaching, and along with the busy schedules, family gatherings, and holiday celebrations, comes copious amounts of food, and with that, feelings of vulnerability and maybe even fear. Thanksgiving can be a wonderful time, but it can also be incredibly triggering and overwhelming for individuals living within their eating disorder or individuals within recovery. Here are some quick tips to get you ready for Turkey Day and all of the joy and spirit that comes with it! Prepare for Re-entry by managing your expectations…..click here to read more! Set yourself up for success! You don’t HAVE to abide by all of the cultural traditions and odd rules that come with “giving thanks.” In other words, try to look at this holiday as any other day, in that you don’t HAVE to eat copious amounts of food in order to celebrate properly! You don’t HAVE to partake in the somewhat twisted traditions like running in a marathon or “turkey trot”, in order to “earn” your meal. You don’t HAVE to starve yourself all day in order to “indulgence” in dinner. Instead, you can go about your day as you usually would, listen to your body, eat when
An Honest Look At Body Image Within Eating Disorder Recovery – Series pt. 1
Body Image. This is a tough one….I have said it before, and I will say it again and again….positive body image ALMOST ALWAYS comes last within recovery. Loving what you see in the mirror, appreciating your size, your weight, your natural curves, and appreciating all of the beautiful flaws within your physical image is so much harder than it seems. So many individual’s struggle with this aspect of recovery….in that the mind can get away from us at times, and we start to become emotionally and sometimes physically consumed by the unrealistic perceptions we have about how we currently “see” ourself, how we want to “see” ourself, how we “see” other’s in comparison to ourself, and how we believe other’s “see” us. Yep, it sounds exhausting, and maybe even ridiculous, but this is the mind of someone within recovery. I use these words carefully, in that when I say “see ourself”, or how “we see others”, I mean this literally, because that is what we are doing, I do not mean how we look or who we are, instead I mean how we perceive ourself. At times it seems that the physical self is somewhat dissociated from the emotional
Spread the Love
Today is a confusing day for several, a hopeless day for some, a victory for several, and a tumultuous day for all. Our country is divided right now, more so than ever. I spoke with Sean, my family, friends and loved ones this morning, and I heard so much sadness, hopelessness and fear in their words, this was scary….our sadness is provoking a feeling of fear, or vice versa, and with fear comes hate, and hate solves nothing. So let’s spread the love today, all day, everyday. Shake off that fear, and bring hope to yourself, your loved ones, and just any random person on the street, because that is the only thing that will get us through this tumultuous time. We may not all agree with each other, but love is something I truly believe our country is capable of, we are TOO GOOD for hate, we have gotten through so much to go back to hateful behavior. So if you are feeling vulnerable, sad, angry, happy, thrilled, scared, hopeful or hopeless, know that you are loved, and that love is the only thing that will bring you and others happiness. Practice self-love, as self-love is what self-care is
Essential Oils and Self-Care Series pt.1
Essential oils are the Holy Grail to my self-care routine. They were an amazing supplement to my therapy, nutrition planning, and treatment plan during the beginning of my recovery. Therefore, I will be starting a Self-Care series about how I use essential oils within my daily, and weekly routine. Today’s post is dedicated to prevention and intervention for that oh so dreaded cold….yes it’s that season, everyone is getting sick, therefore why not boost that immune system and soothe the senses!? When it comes to Eating Disorder Recovery, getting sick with a cold, or the stomach flu, or really anything, is just a part of the process. Your body is doing its very best to build up your immune system, therefore weird things start to happen, like getting sick! In the beginning of my own recovery, I was constantly sick with a cold, sinus infection, bloated, and swollen, because my body was figuring out how to be healthy again…. because in reality, my body wasn’t being treated very well for a good ten years! This was the hard part of recovery…. remember, it gets worse before it gets better! Therefore, essential oils played a major part within this not so